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A Few Excerpts

Your father or male guardian does not have the luxury of knowing your suitors like you do.
Men's opinions on women < women's opinions on men. Got it. Someone who used to be a teenage boy is going to know a lot more about them than a teenage girl. The suitors specifically, probably not. In general, yes.

If things are going well between your guardian and your gentleman caller, your male guardian will dislike your new boyfriend. He'll play with guns if he has them.
Iceowl seems to have gotten their ideas about courtship entirely from sitcoms.

Under no circumstances are males to be trusted. They can be controlled for brief periods during which they are safe. But then they must be either released into the wild or neutered. Domestication is not possible. Under the proper conditions, any male will return to his natural illogical, biologically unrestrained state.
There is a recurring topic in feminist discussion; saying sexist things against women is Not Okay, even as a joke. Broadly, I agree. I would also extend that to men, and am, in fact, personally offended by being compared to an unfixed and untamed dog.

There is nothing more dangerous than an insecure male. All the world's worst wars have been started by insecure men who blame their failures on the weather or other people, and feel their minor successes are worthy of Nobel prizes.
I'm sure Boudica, Queen Elizabeth, and Maggie Thatcher would be surprised to know that. No, wait, you said the "world's worst wars". That's remarkably specific, especially considering that most of the people in and leading the military have overwhelmingly been men, meaning that even if the rate was the same for both genders, it would still give the edge to men. This is only slightly better than the canard "All wars are started by men."

All teenaged boys prefer the company of their male friends to female company. They need time to grow into a non-physical appreciation of women. Right now, the only reason they date women is to practice spawning and then to go back to their friends and brag.
First dogs, now toads. Lovely.

All men have a contemplative side.
Finally, something positive.

Your job is to stay away from it until you can handle what's inside there. Take ten or fifteen years before venturing there. It's full of landmines and useless whining.
Okay, I've got a sneaking suspicion this list was actually written to recruit new lesbians.

Because men deny this contemplative side of themselves as their "feminine side" many are troubled by this aspect of themselves
I like how the closest thing to a positive side in men is the part that's associated with women.

Teenaged boys have a difficult time figuring out how to negotiate their first relationships.
True, but so do gi-

They don't understand the meaning of the term. There is only "doing" or not "doing". Everything in the middle is detritus to them.
...Screw you.

As is true for you, for young males there is a "point of no return" at which for the prospect of sex the male will abandon all common sense and commence the process whether you are ready or not.
Note how no comment is made on the incidence of this state among young men (and exclusively young men). Perhaps it's during the full moon.

However, in both cases, it is nearly unstoppable--and I say "nearly" because the only possibility of getting out clean lies in your ability to generate substantive and believable ridicule. You must be totally disappointed in him. Presuming you're not dating a rapist ( in which case both you and soon your male guardian will be in a whole lot of awful grief. For you bear the physical and mental scars, and he will spend the rest of his life in jail for premeditated murder)
Not only are young men animals who only want to have sex with girls, but their dads turn into murdering monsters the second their daughters are raped.

letting your male friend know the prospect of sex with him is a major yawn is probably the best deterrent.
Because there's no chance a young man will politely respect a young woman's desire not to have sex, and her only hope is being passive-aggressive. I mean, it's not like young women would actually want to have sex with boys, right?

(I'm being sarcastic, but at no point does the essay mention women having any desire for sex. It mentions them having it, sure, but men are the initiators, and women are unlikely to actually enjoy it because men can't understand female sexual pleasure.)

Make no mistake. Your male guardian will cause grievous physical injury (or death) to anyone who harms you. Every day he prides himself on imagining he will do that. Do not pull that trigger unless you are serious. You have seen the movies. Be careful. Some things cannot be undone.

Seeing as movies are well known for their accuracy in depicting healthy human relationships.

Young men do not understand female sexual response. To put a finer point on it: they have zero concept.

Male sexual response, despite what stand-up routines and sitcoms claim, is often a lot more complicated than "10 stimulate penis 20 goto 10". I know that, and I'm waiting until marriage. The list makes no reference to what men like; merely penetrating the goddess called women is assumed to be enough. No man, ever, likes foreplay, or small boobs, or Albanian Pudding Wrestling, and sex is a burden to be borne by the heterosexual woman, since it is entirely impossible that an inexperienced lover can become a better one by listening to his female partner, so she shouldn't even try.

Your mother has probably told you by now, men talk about themselves obsessively
"A wise and sensible woman has probably told you a generalization."

Three, they're afraid you'll start talking about something that interests you...
Because young men are only attracted to young women for their bodies, and under no circumstances would be interested in someone they actually shared interests with.

The best way to get a guy to stop talking about himself is to go to the movies, feed him, or tire him out. Then, when he's not talking, he'll be dead silent and you'll be tempted to ask what's on his mind. Don't. Wait twenty years. He'll start having a genuine interest in what you're thinking. Until then, watch a lot of DVDs.
So, let's review. Men are animals, sex isn't fun because young men don't know what women want, and men don't learn how to take non-physical interest in women until their mid-thirties, at least.

Young men are frequently ill equipped to handle the emotions that arise from having sex.
And so are young women. In fact, studies indicate people's brains don't fully develop until their late teens, lacking critical decision-making structures.

One, most people have more sense than to sleep around like sluts if only because of the horrible deadly STDs out there not to mention the fact that confident people don't need sex for affirmation (remember the caution about insecure partners!),
"Liking having sex means you're insecure, like a man."

and two, nothing other than bullets or drugs has the ability to wreck your life more than a rotten sexual relationship.
That's not exactly true. Any romantic relationship, sexual or otherwise, can have negative effects on people's health, especially after breakups.

I especially like how it says men aren't interesting, then denigrates men for not being interested in women. Double standards much?

Here's a post about the double standards in gender-based t-shirts.
mcity: (omg onoz)

You know, the one I started to write in 2001? With teenage superheroes, a world where superheroes are common licensed, and can merchandise their likenesses, a deep and complex plot and likeable, Whedonesque bantery characters, and so on and so forth, spanning three books?

Yeah, the basic world here is almost identical. The actual characters, and plot, IDK.

The worst part is that it's seems like a really good series, it's dirt cheap on Kindle, and I'd like to read it, except I don't want to appear to be ripping off the series more than I already would be. Then again, many of my ideas aren't particularly original. I just do what Scott Adams recommends; crib from a lot of people better than you and file off the serial numbers. If you use humor, you can call it a parody.
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"Want to see anything besides my front page? Well, screw you, use the archive link!"
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Eric: I don't understand that post, so none of the people who agree with it do either.
Me: If you don't understand it, how do you know whether anyone else does?


Alex: Eric, prove these claims you made.
Eric: It's common knowledge.
Alex: Then you shouldn't have trouble proving it.
Eric: Gosh, I'm not sure I should go through all the trouble. It's sooo much trouble.
[A dozen posts dodging and not proving his claims later]
Eric: What exactly was your problem with that post?
Me: You said earlier that it would take a while to find that information. How could you say that if you didn't know what information to find?

I once caught Eric scoffing at calculations based on the basic principle of a sundial, and saying information from the US Naval Observatory was just something randomly found on Google.

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I just got in an argument with someone on Youtube who said that people who cross the border illegally into the US aren't criminals.

Or course, they also said that crack cocaine only exists because drugs are illegal, and all the problems with drugs and prostitution are caused by them being illegal, so I'm assuming they ain't long on the smarts.
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According to people around the Internet, the husband is still in the wrong because he was "rude" to the wife. Apparently, anything short of "I'll get it to you when I'm finished this match" or "I'll ask Mike over the internet in this game we are both playing right now" is entirely unacceptable.

There are people seriously arguing that he was being "dismissive" despite the fact that, by definition, that requires actually dismissing someone. Was her mistake reasonable? Yes. Is it his fault? Arguably. Is "what's really important" that he appeared to be ignoring her? No, it's second to the question of whether he actually ignored her.

Trying to claim that the appearance of dismissiveness is more important than whether there was any actual dismissal going on is moving the goalposts. Ironically, I've had and seen arguments with people where they do the same thing. Once their interpretation of something is proven wrong, they try to argue that it's wrong to merely give the appearance of such, and never really admit they were wrong.
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I just found a post about "Think Like a Man" and how it's successful, and how Hollywood needs more movies starring black people.

Speaking as a black guy; why?

Read more... )
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Feminism is awesome.  People being allowed to wear whatever they want despite societal restrictions is awesome.  Relegating female characters to repetitive roles in historical films that continually focus on gender as their primary identifying character trait?  Not awesome.

Also boring.

If you are talking about "Brave", Merida's primary character trait is that she's, y'know, brave.

The people making this all about Merida being a girl are the public. Merida being a girl in the film is part of her character. Pixar's had people going "why don't you make a film with a girl lead?" And then they make a film with a girl lead, and people make a big fuss about how she's a girl. Like how people made a big fuss about Tiana being black, yet The Princess and the Frog doesn't slap people in the face with race issues. They are mentioned, but are fairly subtle.

And lets not get into the unoriginality debate, really, let's not. I don't see how it degrades the main character to make a movie that has a plot which involves her being a girl and the historical role. Being a girl is far from Merida's only defining character trait. She's also brave, good with a bow, and really, really ginger.
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I see you've finally gotten around to the original trilogy.

Luke's player to keeps making references to Quick Time Events and autosaves and suchlike. He is playing a tabletop RPG. Yes, he's never played before, naive farmboy, ha ha. Problem is, he should know the difference between Final Fantasy and DnD, no matter how much of a gamer he is. If he's doing this as some sort of joke, please have another character at least point it out somehow.

It is not funny.

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Y'know, X-arielle? I saw her tumblr. Turns out she's gay.

I am now mildly uncomfortable with my criticism of her--no, wait, actually, I'm not. I'm sorry, shipping a 14-year old girl (Violet from the Incredibles) with a grown woman (Mirage) is creepy, end of story, regardless of the artist's preferences. It would be entirely hypocritical of me to claim otherwise. It would be a double standard, and I can't help but wonder how many of her fans rationalize her more questionable art with "she likes girls, so it's okay!" Even leaving aside the whole ephebophilia thing, she seems to have a bit of a fetish for what's euphemistically called "dub-con" by fanfic writers, "RAEP FACE" by 4chan, and "NOT OKAY" by scans_daily.

Well, when it's het.
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Ginny's behavior towards Gabrielle during Bill and Fleur's wedding. Veela charms be damned, Gabrielle is only eleven years old! It's not like Harry's a pedophile. Moreover, Gabrielle only seemed to have an innocent crush on Harry... Yes, Ginny is a teenager, but she is also supposed to be Harry's soulmate. If she doesn't trust him around someone who hasn't hit puberty yet, then how is this relationship supposed to work?

Gosh, you'd think Ginny was a teenage girl who had a crush on Harry at Gabrielle's age or something, except Gabrielle has a genetic tendency to be found more attractive by men and boys when she's older, just like her big sister, and Ginny knows she has a crush on Harry.


Incidentally, here's what Gabrielle looked like at that point. That's certainly older-looking than eleven. The actress apparently had a growth spurt in the intervening three years.

Read more... )
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In addition to the nightmarish skull, I've also found that Florence, in the poster, is about eight or nine heads high. I know she's tall, and I know she has legs out to next week, but I'm calling shenanigans.
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>check address
>it's 2.6 miles away from school on foot
>we're supposed to meet by school tomorrow
>am seriously considering going anyway just so I don't insult him

Pardon me, I have to go locate my spine.
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...was to reinstall the extension causing the conflict. I had simply disabled AB+ believing it was a problem with the extension itself, and was just about to post on the AB+ forum when I decided to try and see if I still had the problem without other Extensions on.

I mad.

I've also discovered that another extension is causing the memory leak that causes Firefox to make FLVs skip after about 400MB or so of memory. I managed to have about five different Youtube videos open without a single one skipping. Also, this extension is causing Firefox to refuse to relinquish its grip on memory even when it doesn't need it. I think it's Greasemonkey, I'm not sure. Time to Sherlock it up.
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>stumble upon an Ask tumblr depicting Fluttershy from MLP: FiM as a sort of dog.

Okay, as long as she's still cu-

>a hermaphrodite dog


>a sentient hermaphrodite dog


>with several detailed drawings of her sheath


>and erotic drawings of her erect pony dick
>and she likes to hump things
>and has sex with humanized versions of the mane cast

That's it. I'm going to burn the Internet down.


Apr. 7th, 2012 05:52 pm
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I don't know why I keep buying these store salads when I know I don't like them.
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"These are no longer Protheans," EDI replied. "There are signs of extensive genetic rewrite: Reduced heterochromatin structure, deletion of superfluous 'junk' genes, and the phrase 'U GOT REAPED LOL' encoded into their genome."


For the record, Mass Effect: Interregnum, covering what Garrus did while Shep was dead in ME2, does shout outs so much better. I generally prefer to put mine in where the story happens to have room for them, like when Alex needed an alias in inPrototype and I chose "Sly Cooper". Broadly speaking, if you can't remove or replace  the reference without the story ceasing to make sense, it's too vital. If you need to know what the shout-out is in order to make sense of what its doing in the story, it's too vital.

In ME:I, there's a scene where Garrus and co get their hands on weapons reminiscent of those from Team Fortress 2, even discussing how much it costs to fire the weapon. This helps to underline the amount of money their employer has. Thing is, it's not a one-off. Garrus keeps thinking of how expensive the mini is during the following action sequence. It's integrated into the story, and can be understood even if one doesn't catch the reference. It's not just some joke shoved in without consideration for whether it fits the tone or not.

Project Gethinator is a light-hearted story, but it at least supposedly has a serious core. Think some of the latter Discworld books. Once you stop portraying the Reapers as an ancient and incomprehensibly powerful force--think space robot Cthulhu--and reduce them to the level of a script kiddie from 4Chan, you might as well be writing a crackfic.

Imagine, say, Inception, or the Dark Knight. Now imagine the dudes from the Hangover suddenly show up. It's not going to work very well.
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In Starfox 64, Andross gets banished to a desert wasteland for doing science in a way the Cornerian military didn't like. He then assembles a multi-ethnic coalition to try and defeat the primarily Dog run Cornerian Hegemony over Lylat. General Pepper even has giant posters of HIMSELF in Corneria City. When his forces are overrun by Andross, General Pepper's last resort is to hire mercenaries to defeat Andross. And of course, those Mercenaries are OUR HEROES, and Andross is a horrific villain, despite never having his "crimes" specifically mentioned.
  • Well, it is implied that he killed Fox's father.
  • He got banished to Venom for creating an explosion that destroyed a large portion of Corneria City, in spite of Pepper's orders to stop his experiments. What you play in the game is him just about to ''conquer the entire system'' until Star Fox drives him back.
I'd like to point out that Andross is clearly said to have killed a tonne of people in his twisted experiments in both the Japanese and US versions of the game's manual.


Apr. 2nd, 2012 01:15 pm
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If your Livejournal is filled with long-form fanfic, how about not making the design 4pt silver text on a white background?


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