PROTIP:

Apr. 2nd, 2012 01:15 pm
mcity: (Default)
If your Livejournal is filled with long-form fanfic, how about not making the design 4pt silver text on a white background?

JUST AN IDEA.

PROTIP:

Mar. 30th, 2012 07:57 pm
mcity: (Default)
You should not write that "Alice sees the form of Bob" unless shapeshifting or bodysnatching or suchlike is involved. If you want to convey uncertainty on Alice's part, say something like "Alice sees...Bob?" or "Alice sees what looks like Bob." Without uncertainty, it's just "Alice sees Bob."

Similarly, Carl's face does not "adopt a frown", unless you're implying the frown is a false expression, or the tone of the story actually requires such verbiage. "Carl frowned." There you go.

And it is not necessarily funny that you're breaking the forth wall, no matter how wacky the injoke.

Think of writing like a taxi; your job is generally to get the reader to their destination as quickly and efficiently as possible. Purple prose is often the sign of someone writing like they think a writer "should" write, instead of using the writing to tell the story.

Read your stories aloud, and see if anyone talks that way. If you have difficulty saying it, it's generally time for a rewrite.

PROTIP:

Mar. 3rd, 2012 10:58 pm
mcity: (Default)
The more complex something is, the more likely it is to fail.

When people speak in anger, they generally use shorter words than they would if they were calm. They are also less likely to think about what they are saying. (I, personally, am an exception to both.)

So if someone is angry, and they are still describing things using words of four syllables or more that no one would ever use in household conversation, there is an excellent chance that what they are spouting is a logical shambles, especially if they use a good deal of certain one syllable words right afterwards.

tl;dr: If someone is pissed off and still explaining things in a complicated way, they're probably wrong. Especially if they swear a lot right afterward.

This post bought to you by someone on tumblr who said that the acts of minorities and social justice advocates oppressing majorities based on nothing more than the fact that they disagree "exist out of a fear of embodying them." Plus ye ode "People of Color can't be racist against white folks". in response to this bit of joy and shining light.

PROTIP:

Feb. 11th, 2012 09:47 pm
mcity: (Default)
Pasta salad, like revenge, is best served cold.

PROTIP

Feb. 7th, 2012 11:52 pm
mcity: (Default)
Divide a salad into hot components, cold components, and neutral component.

If you want to reheat the salad, remove the hot components, and heat them separately. Heat neutral components to taste.

Bought to you courtesy of trying to eat microwaved lettuce a few years back.

PROTIP:

Jan. 18th, 2012 07:44 pm
mcity: (Default)
Watch the Serlock Series 2 finale.

Then watch and listen to this music video.


Florence + The Machine - No Light, No Light


Then boggle.

PROTIP:

Dec. 30th, 2011 11:16 pm
mcity: (Default)
If you hop off the bus at the bus stop next to the McLaren building on The Priory Queensway, Birmingham, West Midlands, England, for some reason (like your bus stopping for two hours while a replacement windshield wiper is bought in), there may be a Tesco up the hill. To get to it, you will pass a perfectly good Games Workshop and Forbidden Planet. Feel free to consider whether to take advantage of the opportunity.

Megabus offers low-cost coaches, and by gum you get what you pay for.

PROTIP

Nov. 3rd, 2011 09:58 pm
mcity: (Default)
If you have a small high-power flashlight, or even one of those tiny LED ones, and you have a cyst on your wrist, touch the lit 'light to it. Then go "coooool".

Also, I accidentally self-diagnosed it as a ganglion cyst.

PROTIP

Oct. 22nd, 2011 09:00 pm
mcity: (Default)
If your pizza has oven only instructions on it, do not try and cook it in a microwave.

I have two more servings of the limp, noodly thing to eat. Urgh.

Protip:

Jun. 3rd, 2011 08:47 pm
mcity: (Default)
If your computer barely, just barely, meets the minimum specs for, say, Assassin's Creed 2, you will not be able to run it at any appreciable quality.

Anyone know where I can get a decent laptop graphics card for not too expensive? Preferably one that's 256MB or so.

I mean, PC Gamers brag about not having to upgrade for several years. For console gamers, that's just plain called a console cycle. And then PC gamers try to make a virtue out of their opaqueness. They make getting a video card to run seem lik membership in the Freemasons.

PROTIP

Apr. 26th, 2011 06:18 pm
mcity: (Default)
If you're trying to get those irritating anti-theft plastic ties off of a piece of packaging, don't reach for the scissors or kitchen knife. Reach for the nail clipper; it's made for cutting small hard things, and is a lot safer.

PROTIP:

Apr. 22nd, 2011 11:01 pm
mcity: (amazing)
If you haven't already, watch "Gran Torino".

...Juuust not in public.

PROTIP

Mar. 9th, 2011 06:33 pm
mcity: (Default)
If you don't have steel wool, or the mess in question in on a nonstick pan, you can try boiling soap or soapy water to loosen it. Or use crumpled aluminium foil.

If that still doesn't help, just pour salt on it, add enough water/soap to make it dissolve somewhat, and scrub, preferably by hand.
mcity: (IM2 stare)
I'd like to recant my earlier post; if you are not trained, you absolutely should not intervene in a fight.

This comic is what changed my mind.

I know we'd all like to think we'd be the hero when someone's getting beat down, but let's face it; the guy on the ground isn't going to be any help, and unlike in the movies, taking on multiple opponents is actually really dangerous. Heck, taking on one guy is pretty dangerous, especially if he's hopped up on adrenaline. You might draw them off, but two people with internal injuries is objectively worse than one with internal injuries.

The first thing most martial arts experts tell you is to avoid the fight in the first place. This is because anyone can roll a Nat 20, so to speak. If you put a 15-year old kid up agains Bruce Lee, he can always get a lucky punch in. When some guy with muscles the size of my torso tells me to stay out of trouble, I listen.

Besides martial arts users have a name for the type of guy who learns to fight so he can go out and court trouble. It's about two syllables long.

Observe and report. Contrary to popular belief, whipping out your cell phone is useful; Eyewitnesses are notoriously unreliable in court, and a camera is a lot more objective. This assumes, of course, that you've already called the police or appropriate authorities.

Also, people tend to get tunnel vision in combat. If they look up, they think of the people gathering as a crowd. You can't fight crowds, and someone in it might've called the cops. Seperate yourself from the crowd, and you're just one fool steppin' to them.

As for the linked comic itself, what's so wrong about not rushing into a dangerous heap of tangled metal, oil, gas and bodies? Trained emergency personnel are often leery about such incidents, much less Johnny Citizen. And Mr. Citizen is a lot more likely to get himself killed.

It's like those commercials for charities dedicated to starving kids in third-world countries; I've seen people ask "why aren't they doing anything to help them"? "They" did. They started a charity. The rest is up to you.

PROTIP

Feb. 21st, 2011 09:48 am
mcity: (Default)
If you're carrying an A2 piece of foamcore paper through the rain with some difficulty, and your bag can comfortably fit an A3-sized object, which is about half the size, then it's a good idea to realize you could've just cut the foamcore in half before you're halfway to your destination.

PROTIP

Feb. 20th, 2011 03:20 pm
mcity: (Default)
If you have something in the oven, but don't have a proper pan to catch the drippings, just use a cast-iron pan. It can take the heat. However, don't use any non-stick pans; they usually can't take the heat. Literally.

PROTIP

Dec. 28th, 2010 10:22 pm
mcity: Rhett and Link - "Epic Rap Battle" (hips don't lie)
Those little bowls that microwavable soup comes in can be used to heat other things after you're done with them, if they're in good enough condition. Keep 'em around.

PROTIPS

Nov. 4th, 2010 12:26 am
mcity: (vectorJonn.png)
No matter how much of a hurry you're in, try to cook burgers on medium heat. Too low and it takes forever. Too high and the outside is charcoal before it's cooked through. and no, searing doesn't seal in juices. That's a myth perpetuated by the sear industry.

If you're burger's still a little pink on the inside, don't bother tossing it back in the skillet. Just stick it in the microwave for thirty second intervals until it's brown. If you''re outdoors, however, feel free to plop it back on the grill. That's the whole point of grills, really.

PROTIPS

Oct. 10th, 2010 12:02 pm
mcity: (Default)
Practice getting out and using the right key without being able to see it. Practice with both hands, just in case. And make sure your blindfold leaves the ears uncovered.

If your place of residence has a door closer, always watch it to make sure it closes properly. Thieves have been known to slip a wad of paper into the receiver to keep the door from locking, allowing them to slip in later.

PROTIP

Oct. 4th, 2010 07:37 pm
mcity: (amazing)
If you go one Wikipedia looking for information on sex positions, make sure you know what you're looking for.

Also, try not to be distracted by the full-color illustrations.

Also, don't be looking for it in public.

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